Saturday, 7 December 2013

The Future of SEO

This is about the future of SEO, not just about SEO, it is about Britain.

When we build links in Britain, we less and less do it manualy, what is done is that we pay others to add a link to a page. We have become link buyers. But, beware the industrial revolution, For that is where we begin.

In the industrial revolution the rich bought your forebears because they were kicked off the land, they worked shit hours for shit pay, but there was fuck all else to go for: fuck else.

Now we are lucky, we have these SEO/Digital media jobs which pay shit loads in comparison to digging a ditch. But don't be stupid. They will export your job to someone who will do it just to live in the ditch as soon as they can.

Do you think your bosses do it to fulfill your lives, or to fill their pockets? As soon as they can your boss will sack you and outsource your job to Burma.

Do not worry managers, the CEO will always require someone to shout at, but be under no illusion, that is all you are.

If you think this is nonsense, cool. However whilst I was working with Caliber in Edinburgh, all I seemed to notice was how much work the company was shipping out to the Philipines. Don't get me wrong it gave them jobs, it also never gave jobs here.

Thursday, 19 September 2013

Perving it up - a method for success

There is a certain knack to using websites to generate traffic, it is having something in common with lots of other people. It seems the more you have in common with lots of other people the more people like/repin/whatever your stuff. This is easy enough if you are into, things that the 'swinish multitude' [quote from Thomas Burke] are into like fashion or fitness or fast cars or motorbikes. But if like me you think these things are vapid, turgid and quite pointless it is almost impossible to realistically pretend that you do.

So, not really getting sites like pinterest, I recently stumbled across a method that works, and it is the same as above, kind of. My pinterest account had lain dormant for more than a year, the odd addition here or there, but it never did much and it had little going for it, then bored on a Saturday night I started pinning a little fetish of mine, cute chicks who wear glasses, I was in effect perving it up. Nothing gratuitous of course, [there might be kids out there] just pleasant to my sensibilities.

Now, I can hear your tiny minds fumbling in the dark, grasping out that you are just sharing with like minded pervs pictures of other things to perv about, but you are only looking at the tiny part of the venn diagram that I was looking at in the first pervy place. Since I was only looking at this one part [and since I am largely ignorant of such things] other people see the things I cannot. You see 'cute chicks with glasses' also exist within a large range of other subsets of which I don't care. Among them tattoos, celebrities, models, they have allegedly fashionable hairstyles, some wear allegedly stylish clothes, and of course some people think they are nerds or geeks. So I get repinned not only from weirdos like me, I get repins from people who have fetishes I completely do not get and cannot see.

This method for succes is not just for pinterest, there are several other similar sites out there which are more nuanced, from imgfave which can be a bit more explicit to gentlemint which is for blokes [though I do not know how they can tell from unless it is obvious from your e-mail and you do girly things], there is even a british version of pinterest called pinspire. These sites of course do not have the same number of users as pinterest, but as they are more nuanced there is a better chance of people coming across your stuff and doing the equivalent of repinning, smaller ponds etc.

There is a place for everyone in this weird little world, even for us pervs, but it does takes time. I am considering opening two new boards on pinterest now, one for short-haired girls the other for redheads, there is much scope for cross perving here.

Friday, 5 July 2013

It is a Lorem Ipsum, go away!

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Monday, 4 March 2013


I am often very harsh in my criticism of #ahem wankvis, some might say too harsh, there might be something in that. I am though resolute in my opinion, however I must give it some credence.

It was the first place/time that I realised that I really don't like SEOs and I really detest what they do.

LinkMünki hath spoketh